10:50 FRIDAY 22 JUNE 2007

New critique published tomorrow in the Weekend Australian ... I think. Otherwise? The sun is out after a waterlogged week, Bee is now identifying almost every letter of the alphabet, Alexander has finished a stunning feature, and I am ploughing through a deeply affecting 4000-word essay. That and ignoring the Everest of admin in whose shadow we all toil. And watching documentaries! (We're now documentary addicts.)

11:35 FRIDAY 15 JUNE 2007

Yesterday was a horrorshow: Bee was immunized for chickenpox, whereupon we walked home... for an hour, in a frigid, torrential downpour. Arrived sodden and with chattering teeth. Slept for twelve hours last night, the longest spell of sleep for me since 2005. Otherwise? Much going on. Arranging Bee's and Alexander's double baptism, features, critiques, and anticipating our vacation. And other than the "little lump of coal" remark, this is just beautiful:

08:02 THURSDAY 9 JUNE 2007

Alexander spies a tray of freshly baked muffins in the distance ...

11:18 WEDNESDAY 6 JUNE 2007

Without any prompting, Bee yesterday pronounced the word "twilight". Otherwise? I am in the thick of a major interview and about to launch into a critique; Alexander is putting the finishing touches on a feature. Watched Borat on DVD; other than a few amusing moments, the whole thing foundered under the weight of Baron Cohen's unsavory sexual problems.

08:15 FRIDAY 1 JUNE 2007

First day of winter in this hemisphere, and the morning is crisp and sunny. Alexander is conducting two interviews this morning and, I think, one this afternoon; he's having the time of his life grilling world figures in his field on ideology. I never knew that marriage could be so sustaining in every sense, and the source of so much happiness. Otherwise? I have finished my work for the day and am preparing to sink into a pile of pillows with a book, and Bee is wailing because she wants a cuddle.

10:40 TUESDAY 29 MAY 2007

Choose a song for Hillary. (Hard to imagine any local politician strutting to Smash Mouth.)

09:57 MONDAY 28 MAY 2007

Important news for all those partial to soft drinks.

21:07 SATURDAY 26 MAY 2007

Headlong into the most absorbing feature I've written for longer than I can remember. Just amazing. Bee's molars seem (seem) to be settling, and Alexander and I are slavering in anticipation of our upcoming vacation. YES! YES! YES! (As Bee does not work and has never been on vacation, she cannot anticipate it.) Otherwise? New page uploaded.

10:05 FRIDAY 25 MAY 2007

Yesterday Bee and I met up with Michelle Linn-Gust, the American suicide prevention and postvention warrior, in from New Mexico for a conference at UNSW. We walked around the Quay and Opera House - she couldn't believe we're on the brink of winter here and still wearing light shirts - and had hot chocolate as we watched ferries bump up against each other. Dropped in to see Brad and Michael. When Michael picked Bee up to admire her, her lower lip trembled and she began to loudly wail. All very funny.

14:03 WEDNESDAY 23 MAY 2007

New page uploaded. Otherwise? Absorbed by a major new feature, Alexander has just filed two utterly exquisite pieces (his last one was syndicated around the world), and wee Bee is now using three-word sentences. At sixteen months.

14:43 MONDAY 21 MAY 2007

Absolutely TOASTED as Bee is simultaneously cutting four molars and screaming on the hour, every hour, into my left ear throughout the night. Feel much like a zombie, as does Alexander, who is currently stumbling about the ruins of our living room collecting flash cards, Fisher Price zoo animals and upended baby chairs as the honey bunny in question sweetly naps.

11:03 THURSDAY 17 MAY 2007

Edward de Bono dropped in for peppermint tea and concluded that our sweet and chatty little Bee was "absolutely remarkable". "She's like a three-year-old!" he marveled. Here he is with her in our chaotic toy-and-book-strewn kitchen (o, for a housekeeper!):

14:30 WEDNESDAY 16 MAY 2007

From Not for Sale: The Return of the Global Slave Trade by Professor David Batstone: “Gary recalls an episode when he went undercover in an investigation of child sex trafficking in Cambodia. A pimp led him to a room where he presented a dozen girls between the ages of five and ten years old. For a few dollars, these children will perform any sexual act requested by customers ... At the moment, slave owners and sex traffickers are not afraid … Victims of sex trafficking, on the other hand, are afraid. Families trapped in forced labor are afraid. Our challenge is to reverse the equation. In that sense, our work has only just begun.

“Slaveholders will buttress these social controls with the constant threat of violence. Almost all trafficked children will testify that they were victims of an extreme act of violence within the first forty-eight hours of their abduction. Whether through rape or brutal beatings, slaveholders use violence to imprint their dominance. In the logic of the trafficking world, a terrified child is a compliant child. The slaveholder therefore will never let the child slip out of a state of terror … The liberal application of violence early on will crack the resistance [the children] will inevitably mount. If a client ever complains that the sex slave was less than accommodating, swift and brutal punishment will be meted out.”

27 million people are currently enslaved - half of them children, many of them under the age of twelve.

Support the abolition of the global slave trade by either donating a few dollars here (via Paypal), here , or here  and by shopping here: http://www.shopinlight.com

And please buy this book - if not for yourself, then for someone you love.

11:20 MONDAY 14 MAY 2007

This was published on the weekend. And oh, how I wish that those impossibly tedious pro-porn saddos would stop assuming:

(a) I have the time to reply to their rambling emails; and

(b) that even if I did, I would.

Otherwise? Cracking news on the book front. Watch this space.

12:54 SUNDAY 13 MAY 2007

The perfect Mother's Day morning. For breakfast, my beloved husband arranged a plate of king prawns in the shape of a heart (!), scooped the dressing in the shape of a heart, prepared bocconcini with tomato, and a spray of strawberries with sugar. The haul? A book he drew, detailing the adventures of our darling daughter (as requested). Very happy.

11:39 WEDNESDAY 9 MAY 2007

Oprah Winfrey, an extraordinary human being.

09:45 TUESDAY 8 MAY 2007

"[L]egalization of the sex trade makes the prosecution of traffickers, pimps, and brothel owners almost impossible. They can use the defense that the girl consented to work as a prostitute, and the burden of proof will be on the girl to prove otherwise. If at any point the girl actually did consent to work as a prostitute, all subsequent forms of coercion will find legal cover.” - David Batstone

11:40 MONDAY 7 MAY 2007

Essential reading on this most beautiful of days.

11:37 SUNDAY 6 MAY 2007

Spent yesterday with Roy, Suzanne, Hope, Violet, Gough Whitlam and Tricki Woo, which was very lovely. Warm sunlight through the leaves, freshly mown lawn, dragonflies shadowing the water, and a perfect afternoon tea (meringues, cream, raspberries, raspberry tea, almond and chocolate cakes). Alexander scarfed most of the chocolate cake and I ate most of the meringues. Bee had the time of her life running around the garden, which caused us to seriously begin considering our housing situation. Otherwise? New issue of My Child on the stands now and in it, my sage contribution to the urgent global issue of postpartum lard.

10:59 FRIDAY 4 MAY 2007

An unbelievable week. Dealt with one of the biggest idiots I have ever known - and one of the most duplicitous - but the situation was deftly handled by senior honcho last night, thank God. Otherwise? Interviewed one superstar and met another, and am spending this morning with my dear, darling accountant. Alexander is wading through two major features and Bee yesterday stormed out of the bedroom after her nap - no cot for our baby! - looked around, and growled like a silverback gorilla.

08:45 TUESDAY 1 MAY 2007

Discovered on a Finnish website that I am the author of Lunch of Bloob and The Pure Weight of the Water.

18:47 SUNDAY 29 APRIL 2007

Major major major interview tomorrow and major interview on Tuesday and then, I think, I may just collapse in a heap after a long weekend of work. D and T just bought the perfect shack in Byron, S and S are enjoying their pregnancy, and we are hoping (hoping) to be able to take a break and fly away soon.

23:19 TUESDAY 24 APRIL 2007

More foreign rights to The Eclipse sold (wonderful). Otherwise? I feel depleted by an overabundance of admin but am enjoying the rain; my beloved husband is not enjoying the rain as he was caught in it twice this afternoon; and our beloved baby is delicious.

13:44 FRIDAY 20 APRIL 2007

Father of the Year Alec Baldwin leaves a message for Ireland, his 11-year-old daughter by Kim Basinger. Otherwise? A new critique in tomorrow's Weekend Australian (probably), another critique just filed, and another on its way. Alexander is completing a 4000-word essay, and Bee inexplicably chirps, "Dee!" every time her Daddy tells her to jump into his arms.

09:45 THURSDAY 19 APRIL 2007

The teenage picture collage from the Some Girls Do ... party. I'm top left, Jessica Adams is second from the right (school uniform), Tara Moss second from left (second row). Jessica reports the 500-strong party was a blast.

20:54 TUESDAY 17 APRIL 2007

Crushed that we had to turn down two fabulous parties - the launch of the Sydney Writers' Festival last week and, in particular, the launch of Some Girls Do ... My Life As a Teenager . The Some Girls Do do ... The Some Girls Do party is being held tonight. Theme: 1980s high school disco with punch and cover band. (God, I ache just thinking about it!) But as I'm still nursing little (big) Bee to sleep, we can't go. We don't believe in babysitters, and she's too young to be left with anyone else, so we're hermits for a tad longer. But, oh! to dance again to Hungry Like the Wolf and Lovecats and Girls on Film and Ant Music with Alexander ... I'll stop right now before I start to cry.

11:04 FRIDAY 13 APRIL 2007

Very funny essay about to be published in The Australian, and - drumroll, trumpets - Some Girls Do ... My Life As a Teenager, the new charity anthology, is now on sale! (My contribution is The Language of the Dead.) So buy a copy of this very excellent book for a girl or woman you care about.

14:22 WEDNESDAY 11 APRIL 2007

The man who plays bagpipes across the park from us is back, and we are overjoyed.

10:48 EASTER MONDAY 9 APRIL 2007

New critique in The Weekend Australian.

10:40 GOOD FRIDAY 6 APRIL 2007

New page uploaded here and my critique of Carmel Bird's embarrassing new offering is coming soon and this is about the divine A. C. Grayling. Otherwise? Watching the rain, listening to my little Bee learn new words, and working on a pop culture essay.

22:04 MONDAY 2 APRIL 2007

From the real Wonder Woman comic:

10:38 FRIDAY 30 MARCH 2007

Dear Quentin in town from NYC, and this is out today.

11:23 WEDNESDAY 28 MARCH 2007

More foreign rights to The Eclipse sold: whooooo-hoooooo! Much book news to report, but not just now. Otherwise? Bee is the gentle funny gorgeous chatty magical baby of all time, Alexander is working on an extensive essay, and I just bought Bee a Dipsy pajama bag, Fred Bare wisteria overalls, two pairs of Osh overalls, and some sparkly gel pens, which I think I will be using instead as they were a childhood fetish. (When I pulled on her cashmere cardigan yesterday, she wonderingly rubbed the material and noted: "Fluffy!") Oh, and my essay on the Louis Vuitton Tribute Patchwork bag will be published in the Australian this Friday, and I think my new critique will be running in the Weekend Australian on Saturday.

14:01 FRIDAY 23 MARCH 2007

Weird weather - boiling humidity, and all the birds have vanished. Otherwise working working working and preparing to enroll my little Bee in a new music class.

15:07 THURSDAY 22 MARCH 2007

The three of us just after breakfast this morning:

11:05 TUESDAY 20 MARCH 2007

Feel like the White Rabbit - "I'm late! I'm late!" - as I struggle to juggle a major essay, topical humor, and little Bee, who waves at her fairies as she chants: "Bye bye, fiwi! Bye!" Otherwise? Alexander is slaloming through commissions and we absolutely loved Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room. As we watched it, we felt we had box seats in hell. Greed: so popular, and so unpalatable.

09:21 SATURDAY 17 MARCH 2007

Today's critique.

12:38 FRIDAY 16 MARCH 2007

My essay, The Language of the Dead, is included in Some Girls Do ..., the charity anthology published by Allen & Unwin. Otherwise? Working on the new book and a little overwhelmed by Bee's sudden - and intensely passionate - separation anxiety. "Tuddle!" she cries, desperate to be pressed to my breast for hours on end, "Tuddle!"

22:05 WEDNESDAY 14 MARCH 2007

Delicately picking my way through prose as Alexander knocks out a major essay and Bee adjusts to a new sleeping ritual. Otherwise? Musing on cruising north for a holiday and craving serious Astanga.

14:06 SATURDAY 10 MARCH 2007

New critique in today's Weekend Australian.

08:48 FRIDAY 9 MARCH 2007

The pregnancy is going well; S is both anxious about possible outcome and thrilled. Otherwise? Bee has taken to squealing like James Brown, Alexander is in the thick of an interview, and I am completing a column.

08:54 THURSDAY 8 MARCH 2007

The Beloved's scratchy throat lasted about a minute before his natural vigor triumphed, and Bee and I are feeling almost normal. Otherwise? Corinna dropped in with a duck and a shirt for the baby, Stephen is still in Uganda, and I am wondering - not a little hysterically - how I am going to catch up on so much work. It's a beautiful day.

12:54 WEDNESDAY 7 MARCH 2007

The Beloved awoke with a scratchy throat, but I am feeling better, as is my little Bee ... marginally. Otherwise? Drastic backlog of commissions. Heaters up from garage. Sent Kimmy's presents to the wrong address. Had the strangest dream about my glamorous mother-in-law and a pair of sunglasses. And blew another few hundred on a fairy tea set, pink cotton pyjamas, and starry Osh overalls for Bee, a gorgeous Fornasetti tie for Alexander, and diaphanous Calvin Klein for less-than-diaphanous me.

14:06 TUESDAY 6 MARCH 2007

The past week has been beyond description, really. We're all toasted. Fractured sleep, coughs, sneezing, fevers, asthmatic fits, and poor Bee's engorged tonsils meant she had no appetite or desire to drink, which just about sent me off the Richter Scale in terms of stress. Alexander (hale, hardy) is the only one who escaped unscathed, which meant that he was responsible for all of us.

08:07 THURSDAY 1 MARCH 2007

Sick as that proverbial dog - fever, cough, throat, head, and streaming nose. Otherwise? New video uploaded here, and working on a new critique. That and a new book. Oh, and fixing Bee's fairy windchime.

14:24 SUNDAY 25 FEBRUARY 2007

Alexander busied himself with the drill yesterday, inserting small gold hooks in the ceiling from which he suspended transparent strings on which feather butterflies had been pasted. (Inexplicably, Bee refers to them as "hi-dodos", an odd and very funny thing as she maintains the integrity of all other words.) He then swept me into his arms and we danced around the apartment to The Ballad of John and Yoko, one of his favorite songs. Otherwise? We are busy awaiting payment from some three thousand people, S is pregnant, Stephen is off to Uganda, and Joan died and is being buried in a beautiful casket hand-painted by her daughter. God bless.

Saving up your money for a rainy day,
Giving all your clothes to charity.
Last night the wife said,
'Oh boy, when you're dead,
You don't take nothing with you but your soul, think!'

10:01 THURSDAY 22 FEBRUARY 2007

The ever-hilarious J reports on the "cashed-up bogans" for whom she works in the financial sector: "Let me give you an example of what they are like. Three of them were standing behind me having a chat. They'd been to some function with their wives. (That's all they ever do ... go to lunch.)

Broker No 1: 'So, how'd you go last night?'

Broker No 2: 'Well, I didn't realise A [his wife] drank three bottles of Bollinger, she seemed okay. When we got home, I found her upstairs, booted and stirruped, lying on the bed.'

Broker No 1: 'So, did you take advantage of the situation?'

Broker No 2: 'Nah ... it would have been like trying to stuff an oyster into a parking meter.'"

Otherwise? Bee pronounces koala "pa-la-la", I've just filed a critique of an atrocious memoir and am now reviewing a far superior one, and my beloved husband has knocked a first person essay on the head and is preparing for an interview. Great happiness - and general fatness - abounds.

09:44 WEDNESDAY 21 FEBRUARY 2007

Howard K. Stern, the late Anna Nicole Smith's lawyer, alleged boyfriend and the alleged father of her child, shows both his deep paternal concern and respect for the law as he films the drug-addled eight-months-pregnant Smith in freakshow makeup and interacting with a doll in a pram. Sociopathy, anyone?

10:57 THURSDAY 15 FEBRUARY 2007

A commitment ceremony marked our first Valentine's Day; a star, our second; and our third involved a collector's set of talking Avengers dolls, a pair of black stone cufflinks, a beautiful black leather bag imprinted with a picture of Bee, and a very romantic evening.

19:29 TUESDAY 13 FEBRUARY 2007

Today, for the very first time, Bee looked at me from Alexander's arms and said: "I blub you."

10:49 MONDAY 12 FEBRUARY 2007

New uploads here. Otherwise? Half-asleep first thing and gazing, head to head, at my caramel-blonde baby girl:

15:46 FRIDAY 9 FEBRUARY 2007

Just reviewed Carmel Bird's awful new book, Writing the Story of Your Life: The Ultimate Guide. Nearly died of boredom reading the dire thing. Otherwise? Working on a new critique and The Major Work.

07:48 WEDNESDAY 7 FEBRUARY 2007

Alexander: "Every day is like Christmas around here." And it really is, other than the sleep deficit and the Ivana Trump hair (now resolved, thank God). Otherwise? Bee is quite brilliant. "Taga" (tiger), "pada" (panda), "tat" (cat), "buddha" (Buddha), "bird" (bird), "teddy" (teddy), han ("hand"), and "manana" (banana): her new words at 13 months. A magical process, and also a privilege to witness. Alexander has just lined up a major interview, I am busy critiquing an awful book and then a better one, and this weekend or next, we are all going to the movies for the first time in 16 months with Roy, Suzanne, and crew.

09:00 SATURDAY 3 FEBRUARY 2007

New critique in today's Weekend Australian. Otherwise? Just received the new My Child (Issue 4, Autumn 07) in the post; it should be on the stands today. In it, I discuss the intense intimacy forged between me and Bee, the angel girl baby of my heart. And the medical industry again astonishes us all with its satanic PR machine:

Bizarre sleepwalking linked to sleeping pill, from ninemsm: "A suspect sleeping pill is causing Australians to paint the front door, binge-eat, and drive while still asleep, a new study reveals. The Federal Health Department has received 16 separate reports of odd 'sleepwalking' behaviour caused by the drug Stilnox ... A woman taking the drug 'woke with a paintbrush in her hand after painting the front door while asleep,' the Adverse Drug Reactions Advisory Committee said in a bulletin published yesterday. Another patient reportedly gained 23 kilograms over seven months while taking Stilnox. 'It was only when she was discovered eating in front of an open refrigerator while asleep that the problem was resolved,' the bulletin said. The committee also received two alarming reports 'which suggest the possibility of driving while asleep.' The new study marks the first time 'inappropriate or strange automatic behaviour' related to Stilnox has been noted in Australia since the drug was introduced here in 2000, although cases have been reported overseas. The health department also received 104 reports of hallucinations and 62 of amnesia relating to the drug. Alan Brindell, a spokesman for the manufacturer of Stilnox, Sanofi-Aventis, told the Herald it had not been proven that the drug was causing the disturbed sleep behaviour. Brindell could not provide an estimate for the number of people in Australia using Stilnox, which is only available on prescription and attracts no subsidy."

08:21 WEDNESDAY 31 JANUARY 2007

Time management currently a serious issue, but will eventually work it out. Yesterday was the most joyous day. Alexander and I laughed, on and off, all afternoon, and this baby of ours just grows sweeter and taller by the day. And this morning? Alexander is on the phone to Texas, and I am trying to work as Bee clamors for my attention.

12:15 MONDAY 29 JANUARY 2007

New upload here. Oh, and Bee has started calling bananas "mananas", which is infinitely adorable.

17:00 SUNDAY 28 JANUARY 2007

We've just bought an enormous new discontinued Madeline dolls' house. This gorgeous edifice not only cost us many, many hundreds of dollars, but is being shipped in from the States. As Bee owns the whole discontinued Madeline doll series, we thought they should have a home. Besides which, she can move all her Pokemon, Babi Pouce dolls, teddies, UglyDolls, Fisher-Price zoo animals, stuffed monkey, dinosaurs, mechanical caterpillar, musical Piglet and plastic faeries in there, too. (Equal opportunity housing.) Otherwise? Finishing an essay, preparing for a critique, and Alexander is roaring through various commissions. That and catching up on last year's sleep-debt. Oh, and discussing attachment parenting with various academics.

15:52 WEDNESDAY 24 JANUARY 2007

Today is the day of dealing with idiots - an idiot from an unscrupulous furniture company, an illiterate idiot in the media, and a fricassee of idiots in general. (That and a plumber, an electrician, and a locksmith all turning up five minutes before we were due to leave for an appointment.) Alexander, on the other hand, has had a day of dealing with drama queens - pouting designers, a squealing girly man in the media, and me, going bananas as I struggled to juggle the tradesmen, the idiots, the baby, and work.

14:30 MONDAY 22 JANUARY 2007

When hairdressers collide: I now look like Ivana Trump. Had to stop myself from bursting into tears ("Brace yourself, woman!"). Otherwise? I am thrashing my way through a major project, Alexander has just submitted the most perfect critique, and Bee's thighs are like two full scoops of vanilla icecream in her little pink frilly-bottomed playsuit. That and summer, which has finally arrived.

20:20 WEDNESDAY 17 JANUARY 2007

Alexander is charmed; a major company has asked to use one of his critiques in a secondary school Advanced English textbook. Otherwise? We're both back at yoga, and I'm working on a first person essay and am also a bit sick (snuffly, the usual drill). Strangely muggy weather, something like the plague climate of old Venice.

12:02 MONDAY 15 JANUARY 2007

Bee's hair has the fragrance and is the color of caramel. Otherwise? Alexander and I are back at work (books, critiques, interviews, the first stirrings of game design). From my cyberporn story in this month's issue of Men's Style: